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Let Them Be Kids

Disclaimer: This my friends is a momma rant, so if that's not your thing, then I'd suggest you stop reading now. 

Do you ever feel like our kids are getting in trouble for the most random of things anymore? A fellow mom friend of mine once asked me what type of school my son attended, because I was constantly sharing with her the latest escapades that I was dealing with. My phone would ring a couple times a week and the principal would be on the line to fill me on what my son "did" and why he was in trouble yet again. 

Looking back on my childhood, I can remember myself and my friends, being silly, talking too much, doing things that weren't the smartest and even the boys just being "boys" throughout the day. We may have been reprimanded a time or two, but it seems like kids can barely even blink without being sent to the office or given a referral for doing so incorrectly. Do you know what I mean? 

Not only do I feel fed up with the constant stream of referrals, but sometimes I start to feel like my kid has a target on his back and the more pressure he feels, the more he acts out. At eight years old, you can't expect perfect behavior and I definitely don't. I've taught him that it's okay to make mistakes, but it's always expected that you take responsibility for your behavior and honesty is the best policy. One thing that I will give him credit for is that he does take responsibility. He doesn't lie to us or try to cover it up. He knows when he's been disrespectful or has stepped out of line and he doesn't hide it. Maybe he's just so used to bringing referrals home for us to sign. I don't know, but I will always give him credit for that. 

Last weekend, I could sense that he needed some mom time, so I took him along on my errands and squeezed in a lunch date so that we could talk, uninterrupted and clear the air. I could sense that he was feeling stressed and under a lot of pressure as Friday he brought home yet another referral. We had conversation and at one point I looked at him in those baby blue eyes and said "I know you've been having a tough time in school and I want you to know this. There is nothing that you can say or do that will ever make mommy or daddy love you less. It's okay to make mistakes and I'm proud of you for owning them. We need to work on thinking before we react and being respectful." He said he loved me too and said he would try really hard to be better behaved in school. We left the restaurant and I had a small sigh of relief as I thought maybe we'd hit a milestone. 

Then comes Tuesday...phone rings and the cycle continues. I never want any child to feel like they aren't good enough or worthy of all of the best things in life. I fear for their confidence as they grow into individuals and discover their purposes in life. I pray every single day when the bus door closes behind him that he makes good choices and has a good experience. 

I feel like as a society, there are times when we almost expect too much out of our youth. I want mine to be kids and stay kids as long as possible. I pray that I can be a safe place for my kids, though I know it can be hard to open up to your mom at times. I pray that my kids will find their passion and have a love for learning even if it's just one subject. I want them to be confident in who they want to be and I hope that I continue to set that example. 

Sometimes this parenting thing can be tough. That's why they make wine or ice cream, right? 






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