Skip to main content

Dancing Around Your Thoughts

Today I looked in the mirror and thought "good grief my eyes look so tired today." It's one of those days where there's just not enough concealer and you need that second or third cup of coffee.

Most of my blogs are typically silly and about rocking the mom life. Don't get me wrong. I absolutely love it and wouldn't change it for the world. But we are all human and there are just certain things that can start to eat at you when kept within. Sometimes when you hold your emotions in, because you literally can't let it out in front of your littles, it can make you feel like you are going to explode. It can make you freaking crazy. In those moments, I tend to take mine and channel them into a good sweat. But sometimes we just need to talk things out.

One of the toughest aspects of my current stage of mom life is when you have something on your heart. Whether you are dealing with some crazy emotions, someone you care about has hurt your feelings, you've experienced something sad or you're struggling to deal. We all experience those times. Whatever you are dealing with emotionally...do you ever feel like you want to scream something from the rooftops to get it off of your chest, but you can't because those little ears are always around and always listening? It's even worse when you don't think they were listening...that is until they repeat your conversation to someone, typically out of context, making their momma look like a big a-hole.

We are currently in that chapter. And dang it...it can be difficult to handle. You have to remember that their curiosity is completely natural and the lack of filter is part of being a kid. But pour me some wine, because it's driving me crazy at times.

I can also remember being that little kid who was so curious about the adult world and what my own mom was talking about with her friends or on the phone. It's perfectly natural, but sometimes when I'm finally feeling like I have an opportunity to express myself, be it to my mom or a dear friend, I glance over and there are those baby blues trying to take it all in. If it's not my kiddos, it's my friend's kiddos. And it stings even worse when my words are taken in, spun and repeated to people who I never intended to know about certain conversations.

If you've watched The Handmaid's Tale, sometimes I feel like June in her having to remain mute, yet you hear all of her inner dialogue. I feel like sometimes I have a constant stream of inner dialogue, because I just can't let it out. The inability to have real conversations sometimes takes a toll. The constant interruptions when you are trying to have an adult conversation while safely dancing around some of your real thoughts to make them appropriate with children present is exhausting sometimes.

I am putting my thoughts down for my fellow moms. It's so easy to feel trapped in your own body and emotions. As moms, we often feel like we have to have our shit together 24/7. Trust me. I am one of those moms. I set the bar extremely high for myself as a working mom of three, as well as staying true to who I am as an individual and sometimes it's taxing. Sometimes it's like we aren't allowed to truly "feel."

It's up to us as moms to find a safe space to let it all out. We owe it to ourselves in order to be the best moms we can be and the best versions of ourselves. Be it over margaritas with a dear friend, on a day trip with your mom or heck, via text, in a social media support group or even in a journal...we have to let our thoughts out. I'm working on it. I hope you will do the same. As moms, we are all in this together. We should be lifting each other up. I encourage you to reach out to a mom friend today and just let her know you are thinking of her.










Comments

Popular posts from this blog

No One Prepared Me for This

This is the part of motherhood that I feel no one prepared me for. Perhaps you can't really be prepared at all. I didn't think it would happen as quickly as it did.  I'm talking about the day you wake up and your firstborn child is looking you in the eye and well on the way to surpassing your height. Can we not?  Seriously!  Sending Rhylan to middle school last year was a very tough concept to grasp. I've come to terms with being the mother of a middle schooler. I mean...what choice do I have? In doing so, I've had a front row seat to extraordinary growth (and I'm not just talking about physically). I've watched him overcome so much. Whether it was constant encounters with a bully (no one prepares you for that either), watching him navigate tough decisions, strengthening his sportsmanship or taking accountability... I'm constantly amazed by him. Last year was fifth grade. He seemed like a baby walking into that giant middle school. We're currently im...

You, My Friend, Matter.

Are you someone who has put herself on the back burner? Maybe you're like me and you've neglected your healthcare needs for years? Today is the day that you make a change. Okay? Say it with me.  I matter. My health and well-being matters. How did that feel? Was it hard to say? Did it leave you with a pit in your stomach? That pit in your stomach is your body's way of telling you that you need to make a change. I decided that a new year was the perfect time to push myself to make an appointment and take the first steps toward medical wellness. Self-care is a topic that we hear about almost daily. We're told to take care of ourselves so that we can take care of others. Make time to rest. Eat well. Exercise. Have a good skincare routine. Declutter our spaces. Listen to our bodies. Meditate. Be mindful. The list goes on and on....and while I have mastered many of those things, I also realize that medical wellness also fits into the equation (whether I want to admit it or no...

What I Learned from Frugal January

While I don't believe in new year resolutions, I do believe in goals, aspirations and dreams. As a society, we're made to feel that with each new year, we must make resolutions, which more often than not, fade by March or set us up for failure. The feeling of failure is never good for the spirit, so a couple of years ago, I decided to stop giving in to that societal pressure. I have found that self-reflection is an excellent place to begin a new year and set realistic goals. This year, I started by challenging myself to what I named Frugal January. It's exactly what it sounds like. I challenged myself to only spend on necessities. I gave up runs to the coffee shop and trips to TJ Maxx. I gave up frivolous, careless and impulse-based spending, no matter how big or small it was. I asked myself one question with every single purchase decision, "do I really need this?" If I could live without it, I declined it. Did this cause me physical pain at times? Yes! There were...