Skip to main content

Shock - Acceptance - Excitement

I really want to share my thoughts during this journey for anyone who may have been in my shoes. And to reassure them that what they are feeling is perfectly normal (at least that's what I tell myself). Everyone handles big news differently. I chose to freak out and panic! Others are more like what you see on TV! Either way, welcome to our crazy journey! 

The next day, I walked into work and decided to let the big news out. I mean anyone walking by my desk must wonder what's going on. What they normally see is a woman who takes pride in her appearance. That day, that got a completely different version of me; makeup-less, sleep deprived and frightened. I'm having (choke) twins! 

I decided to show the ultrasound photo of my babies (still getting used to saying and hearing babies). I was immediately swept up in excitement and joy! They could not have been happier for me. This is where I started to feel the tiniest bit better. They were thinking of names and talking about ideas and wondering if they could be identical, different genders and if they will be as cute at Rhylan! 

At one point, my mom asked me "Are you even happy about this pregnancy?" This really hit me hard. I mean how selfish was I? There are people who cannot have children and people who struggle to have children. We weren't even trying and were given TWO babies! TWO BABIES! This was a reality check for me. I had to head into phase two - acceptance. 

One of the best therapies was Pinterest! Holy Twin Cuteness! And wow, they make amazing stuff for people with twins. Seeing the adorable pictures of newborn twins, the cutest coordinating clothes and the list goes on and on. It was the perfect escape and I found myself starting to get to phase three - excitement! 

One conversation turned everything around for me and I don't even think this person realizes what she said to really help me get to phase three. She looked at me and said, "What you are feeling is completely normal. Soon that shock will turn into acceptance, which will grow into excitement." She was right. It IS okay to feel the way I feel. But at the same time, I am so lucky to have these new babies, even if I am scared of raising two at the same time. 

Everything happens for a reason, right?

Rhylan has said that he is going to have two sisters! There's a chance to know on March 31st at our next ultrasound. All I can say is that this mommy needs a daughter. This could be my last chance! But of course, I will take and love them either way!

By Wednesday and Thursday, I was able to get up, hold my head high, get myself together and say I'm having twins (without choking)! 

I'm having TWINS! 

Comments

  1. UnknownMarch 7, 2014 at 2:17 PM

    I think I'm in a vast majority to have so many friends with twins. Like a TON of my friends have been blessed with twins lately! And you know what? Not a one of them was expecting it, they all worried if they could afford it, if their house was big enough and if it was time to get a van - but somehow, they all continue to survive. They all found ways to make it work for them - just like you will - and they are some of the happiest, yes, tired, people I know. Embrace it. It really is a blessing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownMarch 7, 2014 at 2:18 PM

    **vast minority**

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Snow Days....for Real

  Expectation Reality Screaming yelling and fighting by 8:30 a.m.  Mom chugging coffee.  Dad trying to have work calls while trying to pretend there isn't screaming in the background. Dog paw prints all over the floors.  Instant headache.  Thinking about having a good cry.  Kicking the kids outside.  Kid takes snowball to the face. More tears.  All of the deep breaths. Trying to maintain my work ethic.  Longing for spring and realizing it's very far away.  Wishing I was in my quiet office.  Setting a time to drink wine. 
Post a Comment
Read more

Dancing Around Your Thoughts

Today I looked in the mirror and thought "good grief my eyes look so tired today." It's one of those days where there's just not enough concealer and you need that second or third cup of coffee. Most of my blogs are typically silly and about rocking the mom life. Don't get me wrong. I absolutely love it and wouldn't change it for the world. But we are all human and there are just certain things that can start to eat at you when kept within. Sometimes when you hold your emotions in, because you literally can't let it out in front of your littles, it can make you feel like you are going to explode. It can make you freaking crazy. In those moments, I tend to take mine and channel them into a good sweat. But sometimes we just need to talk things out. One of the toughest aspects of my current stage of mom life is when you have something on your heart. Whether you are dealing with some crazy emotions, someone you care about has hurt your feelings, you've...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Last Firsts

At this time last year, this day felt so far away! My girls are turning one in just two days! Some might say "We made it!" And while I'm so incredibly proud of not only myself and my husband for raising two precious baby girls at the same time, I'm also so proud of these two beauties and who they are becoming. This time last year I couldn't wait for them to arrive. I was miserably pregnant, hot and just ready for the next phase in our lives. Now I look back and think to myself, that was the last time that I would ever experience pregnancy. Everything that we've experienced over this last whirlwind of a year was for the last time. I remember leaving the maternity ward in a wheelchair with our new bundles in tow. I looked back and my eyes filled with tears, because having spent so much time there last year for testing, I got to know the nurses and I realized that I wouldn't be back.  Everyone told us how challenging this would be; that raising two babies w...
Post a Comment
Read more